i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I am mentally ready for anal.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
