Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
