I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
