you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Randomize
