I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
