He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
that may or may not have been my penis.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
