bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
