Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
