It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
my sisters under your porch take her home
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
