i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Randomize
