omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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