Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Randomize
