So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Randomize
