Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Randomize