I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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