He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
There r osticjed everywhere
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
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