38 yer olds are good kisserssss
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
