I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize
