I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
it wasn't lemon gatorade
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
