Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
