we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
Randomize
