He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Randomize
