he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Randomize
