Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
NoShamevember. You game?
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize
