Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
