Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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