Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
