just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
wow bdsm is so cute
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
