So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Randomize
