so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
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