just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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