i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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