Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Randomize
