I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
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