I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Randomize