I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
