well most of my day revolves around power hour
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
