So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
