Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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