yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize