She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
