we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
