its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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