Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Randomize
