Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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