Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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