I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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