i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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