so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Randomize