In the future we'll all be gay
I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Randomize
