JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Randomize
